It’s been a while since we updated the blog and hope you are reading more and more books.
For all those have like to look at life in a broader, deeper and meaningful perspective, this author will give you insights on how spirituality can guide to become a better human being in various stages of your life.
Gopika Kapoor has written 2 bestselling books on Parenting and Pregnancy , keeping spirituality at its core. Her new book dwells deeper on how spirituality can change the way you look at relationships. It gives a perfect guide to take right steps from dating to marriage.
Gopika is a communication consultant, an NGO worker , an author and also written extensively for various print publications.She has studied Vedanta under the ‘Chinmaya Mission’. In her free time she loves playing the guitar, reading as many books as possible, initiating and carrying out various charitable projects and spending quality time with her family.
Her new book ‘Spiritual Relationships’ will unveil a lot of dating mantras which will help you guide you in meeting your right partner and sustaining long term healthy relationships.
Her mantra in life is ‘If you want to have a happy relationship with anyone – your partner, your child, your pet, your mother-in-law, just about anyone – first become happy yourself’. Now that’s something to really think about!
Read her interview to find out more..
1. Who inspired you to take on spirituality?
In spirituality it is said that when the student is ready the master appears. So it was with me. When I was a week pregnant (and I guess, ready to receive knowledge even though I didn’t know it then!) my husband’s aunt, an ardent devotee of Swami Chinmayananda and a very learned lady started a Vedanta class. That’s how I started my study and it’s been nine years since then.
2. How did spirituality change you as a person?
Before I started studying Vedanta under the Chinmaya Mission, I was not inclined towards spirituality or spiritual studies even the slightest bit. But when I started my study, I was hooked. My entire perspective of the world and my life changed completely. It was as though I had been looking out of a muddy glass, which was suddenly cleaned and I could see the view clearly. I realized that so much of what I value in life – all the material things – actually mean nothing when you look at them in the larger scheme of things. I also reflected on my own life and how it had unfolded, and the events that were the most traumatic had actually made me grow and mature. I also became so much calmer and more content to let life unfold than get agitated when something unexpected was thrown my way.
3.Were you so spiritually inclined when your first fell in love or became a mother?
Not at all! I was your average young working woman. I worked with an NGO working in the field of women’s rights and had absolutely no interest in the Geeta or anything remotely spiritual. I must have been about a week pregnant when I started attending a Vedanta study group and this changed my entire perspective of life. A friend of mine says that it was my kids’ sanskaras that prompted me to join the study group!
4. What are the spiritual tools that one needs for a successful relationship?
I think you need to know yourself and what you want out of life and a relationship. You also need to have the ability to look beyond the physical and really see what a person is about – is s/he a good human being, are your values and beliefs compatible, can you see a future together? And above all, you have to have faith in the relationship and the belief that your life is moving according to a divine Master Plan, and whatever happens is in keeping with this plan.
5. As this generation is called the makeup and break up generation where nothing lasts long, how does one sustain a meaningful and long relationship.
I think you need to keep growing in the relationship, as well as an individual. You need to give each other space and respect it. You also have to make sure that you’re not taking each other for granted, and be grateful for the relationship you have every single day. And more than anything, I think you have to not take life too seriously and be able to laugh together – that’s the true cement of any relationship.
6. ‘First impression is the best Impression’ your take on that?
If the impression is purely physical, then I don’t agree. There have been so many times in my life when I have got a really good or bad first impression of someone based on how they look or project themselves, and have had to change my mind about them once they have revealed their true colours. However, there are a few times when our instincts tell us to stay away from some people or are strongly drawn towards someone – in this case I would listen to my gut feeling.
7. Datings do’s and don’ts/
Be open to the person you are dating
Be willing to look beyond their physical appearance to discover who’s on the inside
Be honest with yourself about what you want
Guard yourself against the terrible threes – jealously, possessiveness and ceaseless expectations
Change yourself – physically, mentally or spiritually – to be with a particular person
Lose yourself in a relationship – there is a life beyond the one you love
Get caught up in ego battles
8. A perfect date according to you.
If you’d asked me this question 10 years ago, I would’ve given you the usual spiel: candles, wine, long-stemmed roses, soft music, etc. But as I grow spiritually, I realize that moment spent just being with the person you love is enough to qualify as a perfect date.
9. Do you believe in the concept of Soul mates and does spirituality plays an important role in keeping the connection alive?
In my book Spiritual Relationships, I’ve turned the concept of soul mates on its head. Read it to find out more about this! (If you want me to elaborate more in this answer, let me know and I will send it to you)
10. A day in your life
Rise at 6.30am and wake my kids up at 7 after packing their snack. Morning rush getting everyone and myself ready and out of the house. I leave at 8.45am for work at Ummeed Child development Center, an NGO where we work with kids who have developmental disabilities. I work from 9 to 2pm. Get home and have a quick lunch and either try writing something or update social media to market my books. My kids are home at 3.30pm and then on it’s their time – swimming, classes, talking about their day, playing games – it’s all about them. My husband is home around 6.30 and we all have dinner around 7.30. The kids get ready for bed and read to themselves while we go for a brisk half-hour walk. We’re back around 8.45, tuck the kids in bed after reading to them and saying prayers. We’re often out, but otherwise, I’m in bed with a book, and unless it’s a page turner (which regularly keeps me up till 5am – very unhealthy, I know!), I’m fast asleep by 10.30pm.
11. Favourite hangout spots
In Mumbai: Lalbaug Market (I love the colour and life, especially during Diwali), Colaba Causeway, Matunga Circle (for dosa), and my all-time favourite, the strip between the Taj and Radio Club.
12. Favourite food and holiday destination
Favourite food: Thai, Italian, Lebanese
Holiday destination: Somewhere that I’ve never been before!
Publisher: Hay House India
Price: Rs 299
Signing off for now
Until next time Geeks.
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